What great followers know NOT to do 🙅‍♀️

As a dancer, our only job is perform our part well - no more, and no less.

We cannot, and should not, try to do our partner's job.

Ballroom dancing is a 50-50 partnership.

And it only works when each partner focuses on doing their own part well, trusting that their partner is handling their part to the best of their ability.

Stop doing this if you want to follow well ⚠️

Don't Count For Your Partner 🤐

Don't count your partner in or start counting for them if they're off time.

The reason for this is simple - in ballroom leaders are responsible for communicating the timing.

It's ok if your partner isn't dancing to the music; they'll never learn unless they're given the opportunity to try and to progress at their own pace.

If your partner asks for help, of course it's fine to help them get started; the issue we want to avoid is the habit of imposing your timing on the leader.

As a Follower, if you're dancing to the beat of the music, you'll actually be ahead of your partner, and they'll never be able to lead you.

Practice tuning into your partner and train your body to move to their rhythm rather than ignoring them and following your own interpretation of the music.

Because, the truth is, as a follower - you don't know the count for the next move because it's the leader who decides what the next step will be.

At the basic level, sure a Waltz step is 123 but if you get in the habit of imposing your timing on the leader - you won't be able to follow when they want to change it up and lead a step that's 12&3, 1(23), or 1&2&3.

Practice following your leader's timing now, when the steps are simple, and you'll be a more skilled and responsive follower at the higher levels.

🚫 Don't Correct Your Partner

It's ok if your partner makes a mistake or doesn't lead perfectly; this is a normal part of the progression in learning to dance.

But pointing out our partner's mistakes isn't helpful; it puts undue pressure on people and makes it harder for them to dance well.

As a partner, our job is only to dance with someone as they are - not to correct them, teach them, or to make suggestions for improvement.

Note that as a teacher, it is my job to offer corrections; but when I'm out social dancing (and thus dancing in a partner role), I don't teach or give feedback.

Because that's not my place in that moment.

And the truth is - no one is a perfect dancer.

If we pointed out every error someone makes, ballroom dancing would be the most dreadful activity with constant complaining.

So give every dancer the grace to work through the stages of learning in their own time.

And, whenever you're tempted to correct your partner - offer a compliment instead 🤗

Don't Tell Your Partner What Moves to Lead ❌

I see this a lot in social dancing.

If the Leader is just dancing basics or "simple" moves the Follower will "suggest" moves for the leader, sounds like or "Look, you can turn me here".

You might think it's helpful to jog their memory with moves they've learned in class.

Or maybe you think it would be super easy to add a turn and you'd both have more fun.

Here's the thing:

Anytime, you tell the Leader what to do - you are in essence saying:

"What you're doing now isn't enjoyable enough for me"

⬇️

YOU aren't enough for me.

⬇️

I need YOU to change so that I'm more comfortable.

No one deserves to be treated this way.

Please, please - just accept your partner as they are without trying to impose your will on them.

Let them focus on leading; whatever they know or are comfortable leading is fine.

Your job is to focus on following whatever is offered.

It works out better for everyone that way ☺️

Some Love for our Followers ❤️

In many ways, following is an under appreciated skill.

I've even witnessed ballroom teachers give detailed intrusions to leaders and tell their partners to "just follow".

Following is an active role, a learned skill, and requires years of practice to do really well.

But you don't have to be perfect.

Even if you can't see the progress, every dance you get better, more responsive, and more capable on the dance floor.

So enjoy your time in the ballroom and the beauty of each step along the way.

Stay tuned and check out our other Blogs for more dance tips 💡